When you get stuck thinking that the world is a trap and it sucks you in and you can’t escape, go deeper. Don’t back away–follow the feeling to its extreme. If you suspect you are selfish, go to the extreme of what selfishness means. Confusion largely results from not following feelings or ideas to their depths. People say they want to live forever, or they want this or that new car, or a certain amount of money to make them happy, and so on, but follow that line of thinking to its end. What would it be like to have those desires fulfilled? When you get caught fantasizing about someone you desire, turn the embroidery around and look at the back. Look at all that mess on the underside, but don’t get caught doing it. Do it in secret, because on the front of your embroidery, you’re playing the game that everything is just as it’s supposed to be. That’s what makes you human, and that’s what makes you funny.
By some turn of fate you arrived here and scrolled this far. Now what?
A place to start:
This site is an ever-evolving personal portfolio. The landscape is a bit bumpy.– Books I’ve read have their own pages, where you will find notes I transcribed for later reference.
– Some authors have their own pages. They’re Jung, Watts, and Woodman for now.
– There is also a wide array of other content like some of my informal writing, creative pursuits, and all sorts of unfinished business surrounding lyric libraries, etc. It’s a mixed bag here for sure. But should be cool to bop around.
– Oh, also, there are a lot of books I’ve read and things I’ve written recently that aren’t on here. Ugh! Blah. It sucks. See two boxes down for the full explanation, but here’s an incomplete list of links to things you can’t actually find on this website that rly should be here eventually but who rly knows when
BOOKS I’M ORGANIZING NOTES FOR ON ROAM
ACADEMIC WRITING FROM RECENTLY
OUTOFTHETRAP TWIT / INSTA / MEDIUM
PERSONAL TWITTER – ME BEING EXTRA
there are more links in other parts of this accordion sorry for the hassle if anyone’s actually reading this : )
i’m not gonna sort all these subsections correctly rn sorry. this isn’t a map. it’s a streaming spew of potential directions to go. non-exhaustive. i should really get a search bar…
General lay of the murky landscape.
This site is an ever-evolving personal portfolio. The landscape is a bit bumpy.
– Books I’ve read have their own pages, where you will find notes I transcribed for later reference.
– Some authors have their own pages. They’re Jung, Watts, and Woodman for now.
– There is also a wide array of other content like some of my informal writing, creative pursuits, and all sorts of unfinished business like intentions to create pages dedicated to specific psychological theories, artists, lyric libraries, etc. Really anything I find significant and want to keep in my little pocket.
– But… there are a lot of books I’ve read and things I’ve written recently that aren’t on here. It’s not my ideal situation, having my portfolio all fragmented, but it’s the reality. See two boxes down for the full explanation, but here’s an incomplete list of links to things you can’t actually find on this website that rly should be here eventually but who rly knows when
BOOKS I’M ORGANIZING NOTES FOR ON ROAM
ACADEMIC WRITING FROM RECENTLY
OUTOFTHETRAP TWIT / INSTA / MEDIUM
PERSONAL TWITTER – ME BEING EXTRA
Yeah… so this isn’t a map. it’s a streaming spew of potential directions to go. Non-exhaustive. I should really get a search bar… It’s on my to-do list.
Recent interests / ongoing projects / things that have my attention
– I started a newsletter. You can sign up at the bottom of this page but here is the Medium account I’ll be posting to as well. I’m doing a tarot theme of monthly letters. Did the Fool for #1 and drafting the Magician currently
– I am finishing up my second quarter of grad school. It’s a Masters in Counseling program. Here are all my course readings and notes from the past few months.
– Books I’m actively taking new notes on:
Memories, Dreams, Reflections current page ~ Roam Notes
- Also don’t know why I even made this section bc I’m not going to update it consistently enough to be accurate. First an only update: 3/6/21. How am I doing? Can you tell I have ADHD? Lol.
– I just bought an electric guitar. Music updates are sometimes found on my instagram and I post on youtube sometimes. Oh, and here’s the music page on this site. Probably start there.
– Been painting a lot and made an instagram for my artwork. That’s here. I’m also painting a huge ongoing mural on my staircase.
– I have a 1 year old. She’s awesome. I might do some more writings on parenting if I ever get to it, but here’s my thoughts on year one if you’re planning to reproduce and want guidance from a chick who completely winged it when she got knocked up by happy accident at age 24
I found a tool that seamlessly integrates all this disjointed knowledge, and now I’m torn between platforms.I am learning CSS and super-note-taking with Roam. Here are two drafts of articles explaining my plight with this app:
– Integrating past dream journals, etc into Roam’s archive of my brain
Here is my very incomplete/non-exhaustive map page on Roam. There’s so much I could include here more specifically. Wow. This is not as concise or helpful as I wanted it to be. Oops. Haha. Sorry. :
COOL ROAM THINGS ON MY GRAPH – things I’m adding to over time
Symbol dictionary ~ Glossary ~ Archetypes
Music ~ Art ~ Photography ~ Astrology
Intentional Content ~ All Writing
Ideas ~ Goals ~ Dreams ~ Depth Psych
These dont all have links because I got too lazy to add them. Maybe I will some day. That’s the kind of stuff I’m doing on Roam though.
Wait… what? I am confused but still here. Who even are you? Why should I care?Yeah man, idk. I have a lot of ideas and I’m not great at organization or execution. One might say, then why don’t you just get back to basics? Cause I like complexity. It’s fun and colorful and I can have a cool background that makes me feel lost in space.
I’m Felicia, aka Echo the half-elf bard. I’m a confused 26 year old trying to leave a trail of crumbs for my scattered mind to use as inspiration and reference later. I do things like make this accordion to procrastinate from my looming grad school deadlines.
sup https://t.co/2sTeIwzduR pic.twitter.com/l2lvnyevLS
— outofthetrap (@outofthetrap_) March 3, 2021
Overall, this is one landing zone for the unfinished business I’m putting out there for my own meditation and easy access. It’s clearly not optimized for anyone else but me. But, because someone might like to see it some day, I’m trying to figure out how to share my ongoing process.
The primary issue is I have too many realms of my psyche to share and no system to consistently capture them all. Other than this accordion, my “Being” page might be an interesting place to explore, though I last updated it many months ago. There are also tagged archive pages you can get to by typing in outofthetrap.com/tag/poem for example.
There is also a random post button below that says “Aimless.” If you’re still reading this you seem pretty aimless. Maybe you should click it and see what you find.
Library
Aimless
Cosmos
Pacifica
join the numinous discovery club
~ non-exhaustive collection of things to click on ~
- The Spectrum of Perfection and Completeness
- thesis ideas
- hecate as an elder woman icon
- circle for hekate
- cycle of life, the
- the dented cup
- counseling & therapy skills
- beyond doer and done to
- A Crash Course in Listening
- The Weight of Life
- alex g – race
- false advertising
- method acting
- the big picture
- pot of gold
- be kind
- wake up
- Alex G – RACE
- Lifted or The Story Is in the Soil, Keep Your Ear to the Ground
- gumption cup
- no bad parts – richard c. schwartz
- addictive thinking
- reframe your brain
- the power of ted*
- ethical slut, the
- force of character, the
- soul’s code, the
- state of affairs, the
- in quest of the mythical mate
- flow: the psychology of optimal experience
welcome
to the chaos that is my mind
*my original welcome page… I don’t want to delete it bc it captures the vision I had when I started in 2016
this website is a work in progress. for now, it contains disjointed and incoherent puzzle pieces of an eventual kind of cognitive roadmap. these small seeds might grow one day. I’ll try to update the website as I go from now on instead of saving all the knowledge bits as neglected word documents
in 2016 I began transcribing notes and citations verbatim from books/other media for reference later. the goal has been to build a personal library, navigable by keyword, topic, author, etc. the point is not to lose what i learn–to help me easily access it for reference or reminders over these ticking years and unending curiosities. whatever the heck has tickled my fancy to keep is pretty much here
one day i’ll figure out enough about website design to make everything a tag and illustrate how interwoven even seemingly unrelated topics truly are. i hope i can even write my own books some day. for now I am in an information collecting phase of life–and there is much still to collect. maybe if i get better at sorting as I go future me will appreciate it
yet to be woven threads… why keep them to myself in the meantime?